Wishing and Hoping Page 4

  Over and over she told herself that the awareness thrumming through her was purely sexual, but she couldn’t help remembering that he was marrying her to protect her dad, his mentor. For as much as he’d tried to make her believe he was a jerk, she kept seeing that he had a soft side and she wished she wouldn’t. Every time she realized how much he was putting himself out for her father, she started seeing the Prince Charming in him again and she didn’t want to. She wanted that to be a lie. A sham. Her own imagination. She did not want him to be nice. She most certainly didn’t want to like him. He’d made himself very clear the day before when he’d told her theirs would not be a real marriage. If she liked him too much, she would end up getting hurt.

  She was glad he made the excuse of needing to check in with his hands, and left her to her own devices. She didn’t even care when she saw him get into his truck and drive off. She jumped in her car and drove to her mother’s, where she spent two hours deciding everything from what color her two cousins should wear as bridesmaids to which of their friends and neighbors should be invited.

  When she returned to Drew’s house to find it was still empty and there were no messages on his answering machine telling her where he was or when she could expect him back, she told herself she was grateful for his rudeness. It reminded her that he could be a real jerk.

  But when another four hours passed without a word from him, that gratitude turned into absolute fury. The idiot had left her alone in his house. A house she didn’t feel at liberty to explore now that she knew he had money. She didn’t know where he was or what he was doing. If he had been in an accident, she didn’t even know to send somebody out searching for him.

  When he finally arrived home, she was waiting at the door. “Where were you?”

  He bestowed upon her the sort of patient male look that all but locked in her perception that he was a total idiot. “What makes you think I’m supposed to check in with you?”

  “I didn’t ask you to check in with me. I’m a guest and you left me without a word. I had no idea where you were. So after I spent two hours planning our wedding with my mother, I sat here waiting for you, and I’m starving.”

  “You should have just eaten without me.”

  Shooting him daggers with her eyes, she turned and strode into the kitchen. “Very nice of you to tell me now that I can make myself to home.”

  “I thought that went without saying, since we’re getting married.” He followed her through the swinging door into the kitchen. “I have the prenup.”

  Tia stopped. The prenup. So that’s where he was. Getting the document that put an end to all the worry she had that he might think she was trying to trick him. Once she signed it, he would recognize she didn’t want his money. And she wouldn’t have to walk on eggshells around him anymore.

  “Great.” Tia walked to the refrigerator, extracted a bag of rolls and a package of deli meat and took them to the table where he sat. “Where do I sign?”

  He handed her the agreement. “Last page.”

  “Got a pen?”

  “Aren’t you going to read it?”

  “Should I?”

  “Yes.” His voice was quiet, not at all grouchy or demanding, and she suddenly knew what was going on. Pragmatic Drew wanted her to see he wasn’t cheating her. If nothing else, she always had to give this guy credit for fairness and common sense. Only an idiot signed a legal document without reading it.

  “You’re right.”

  After making a sandwich, she sat at the table and quickly scanned the agreement, reading exactly what she expected to read: articles that outlined that they would each keep the property that they had when they came into the marriage and not have a claim to anything owned by the other. It was short and simple and Tia almost stopped reading, but the very last paragraph shifted in tone.

  She read the article and slammed the prenup on the table. “Very funny.”

  “I didn’t put any jokes in there. So you’re going to have to explain which article tickles your funny bone.”

  “I told you I didn’t want your money. Yet, this agreement says I get a hundred thousand dollars on signing.”

  “The hundred grand is for a house.”

  “I have a house!”

  “I know. But you said you have a mortgage. And I also realized that though you might make a lot of money in that job of yours in the future, as an employee at the bottom of the ladder you don’t make all that much money now. So, the hundred thousand in the agreement is my share of making sure our baby has a home.”

  She considered the gesture for only a second before she said, “I don’t want it.”

  “This baby is our responsibility—both of ours.” He said the words gruffly, as if he didn’t want her to make a big deal out of it. “I take my responsibilities seriously.”

  Tia stared at him for a second. Still dressed in his jeans and lightweight chambray shirt, he didn’t look like a prosperous breeder. He looked more like one of the hands. But he was prosperous and this was his child and he did have a right to make sure his little boy or girl lived as well as he did. So, giving her that money wasn’t a kind gesture. It wasn’t even a fair thing to do. It was his way of assuring his child had a home.

  She picked up the pen and signed the prenup.

  “You ought to go over to your parents’ tomorrow,” Drew said, then took a big bite of his sandwich.

  “I was there this afternoon. My mother and I covered everything we needed for the wedding. It’s not going to be a big, splashy affair. More like a picnic with a few of us dressed formally. There’s not really anything else for us to plan.”

  “Maybe not, but planning the wedding is one thing. Making sure your dad is blowing this off as no big deal is another. Did you talk to him today?”

  “No, he stayed in the barn.”

  “That’s why you need to drop by again tomorrow. He has to see you happy and casual about this whole deal so he will be, too.”

  Since that made sense, Tia nodded. “Okay. I’ll go over tomorrow.”

  “After that, just drive back to Pittsburgh.”

  “Okay,” she said, suddenly tired. Going from liking Drew to hating him to understanding him was draining. But no matter how coolly he treated her, she couldn’t get away from the conclusion that he was a good man. A good person. She had to treat him fairly, but she had to find a way to do that without resurrecting her fairy tale that he was her Prince Charming. Because it was abundantly clear that he didn’t want to be.

  She ate her sandwich and had a glass of milk, then excused herself for bed. She woke the next morning still tired, so she rolled over and went back to sleep. When she finally did get out of bed, Drew was gone.

  Adjusted to the fact that he planned to ignore her, she showered, dressed and drove to her parents’ house. Though her mother chatted happily, filled with wedding ideas, her father barely said hello, and after he did, he raced off to the barn. He didn’t appear upset with their situation but he hadn’t talked to her in the two days since she’d announced she was marrying Drew.

  She decided not to make too much of it, but pulling out of her parents’ lane that afternoon, Tia unexpectedly thought about her brothers. This was how their separation from the family had started. Both did something their dad didn’t like and in both situations their dad simply stopped talking. Ultimately, both Jericho and Rick had left town and now neither one of them even visited.

  Still, she didn’t think that would be her fate. After all, her dad didn’t really seem angry. And she did know he was busy and preoccupied with the election. And the whole purpose of this charade was to downplay her pregnancy. Technically, his ignoring her proved that they had accomplished their purpose.

  As she drove down the tree-lined country road on her way back to Pittsburgh, she approached the lane to Drew’s horse farm. The natural instinct rose up in her to thank him for realizing the smart thing to do in their situation was to get married, but she knew she had to fight it. Drew might be a go
od man at heart, but he wouldn’t want her thanks. He didn’t really seem to want anything from her at all. Except that she stay out of his way.

  By the time Tia returned to her house in Pittsburgh, she was exhausted from the drive and glad to be out of the town where she had to pretend to be joyfully in love with a man who hardly tolerated her.

  Happy to be in familiar territory, she kicked off her shoes in her silent foyer and walked into her kitchen, where her answering machine was blinking.

  She pressed the button and, more comfortable than she’d been in days, ambled to the refrigerator to pull out the orange juice.

  “Tia!” the first message began. It was her boss. “If you’re there, pick up!”

  She grabbed a glass from the cupboard, confused by Glenn’s harried tone.

  “Pick up! Damn it!”

  Hearing his voice shift from harried to angry, Tia froze in the center of her kitchen.

  “Has anybody tried her cell phone?”

  “I did.” That voice was Lily Killian’s. “My call went directly to voice mail. I’m guessing she doesn’t have her cell turned on.”

  Tia squeezed her eyes shut. She’d turned off her cell, not wanting to be interrupted when she went to Drew’s to tell him she was pregnant, and she’d forgotten to turn it back on.

  “Damn it, Tia! When you get this message, call me. Barrington Cereal rejected our campaign. They called it a stupid piece of fluff. We’re all working this weekend. Where are you?”

  Chapter Three

  When Tia opened her eyes on her wedding day, her stomach plummeted. She’d just been through the worst two weeks of her life and today she was marrying a man who didn’t really want anything to do with her. When she’d called him to tell him that the work resulting from her firm’s failed account didn’t leave time for a honeymoon or even for her to come home that weekend, he’d been glad. Glad. Though she knew she shouldn’t have been insulted, she couldn’t help wondering how she’d get through eight months of weekends with a guy who had absolutely no intention of being nice to her. Not at all. Not ever.

  The temptation to pull the covers over her head and forget about the whole damned world was strong, but she couldn’t do it. She had a gown, a veil and a hundred pounds of chicken being barbecued by Ronnie McQuillan. So what if she might soon be fired because it had been her idea that they’d used for the Barrington account? That was small potatoes compared to the fact that she was about to have a baby and she didn’t want to reveal the circumstances of her pregnancy when her dad was already overwhelmed with stress from his first contested election in close to twenty years.

  She did pull the covers over her head. Why was everything going wrong at the same time? She worked so hard to keep everything under control but suddenly she was being yelled at by her boss, marrying a man who didn’t like her and trying to fool her father. Never in a million years would she have believed her life would turn out like this. But here she was in the middle of a mess.

  Hearing a knock on her bedroom door, Tia slowly pulled the covers away from her face. “Who is it?”

  Her mother entered carrying a tray. “Just me,” she said happily. “I brought you breakfast.” She set the tray on the bedside table as Tia sat up. “Even though the wedding’s not till five you’ll need the energy.”

  “Thanks.”

  Fussing over Tia’s sleeveless white satin dress hanging from the back of the open closet door, Elizabeth said, “I don’t want you to worry about a thing. Today is your special day.”

  This was another reason why Tia couldn’t bail out on this wedding. Her mother had done absolutely everything she could to make this day perfect.

  Summoning all her energy, Tia smiled and said, “Thank you very much, Mom, for everything you’ve done. I’m sorry I couldn’t help more.”

  Elizabeth smoothed her hand across the pink floral-print bedspread of Tia’s bed. “Don’t worry about it. I know from experience with your dad that work problems don’t take a vacation just because you have something going on in your personal life.” She grinned mischievously. “Besides, it was a lot of fun to plan your wedding. Especially without you. Now everything is exactly the way I always dreamed your wedding would be.”

  Tia laughed and her mother headed for the door. “There are a few last-minute details I need to attend to…”

  “What can I do to help?”

  “Nothing! I’m having a ball. Let me handle everything.”

  With that, Tia’s mother left the room, and Tia fell back against the pillows of her bed. Her mother was too darned happy about a wedding that wasn’t real. Her dad hadn’t talked to her properly in the two weeks that had passed, even when she’d called to say hello. If he was as angry as she suspected he was, deciding to get married hadn’t accomplished the purpose she and Drew wanted.

  The whole situation was wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong. Tia’s brothers might be able to lie to their parents without qualms, but Tia could not do it. She had to fix this. Surely, now that her dad had had time to adjust to the fact that she was pregnant, she could explain that she didn’t really want to marry Drew and get both herself and Drew out of a wedding neither of them wanted.

  Actually, that sounded like a fine idea.

  Quickly dressing in a pair of shorts and a T-shirt, Tia went in search of her father. After an hour of walking through barns and sheds, she found him in the foreman’s office in the stable and gingerly knocked on the frame of the open door.

  Her father glanced up from his discussion with the ruddy-faced foreman, Jim Tucker. “Tia? Why aren’t you getting dressed?”

  “Wedding doesn’t start till five. It’s not even noon yet.”

  “Don’t you have some girlie thing to do?”

  She laughed nervously. “Yes and no.”

  “Well, go do it.”

  She smiled shakily. “I’d like to talk to you, first.”

  Her father pulled in a breath and Tia watched Jim Tucker tense, reminding her of her father’s condition. No matter how angry he was, if she called off the wedding she could actually make things worse.

  Plus, there was that hundred pounds of chicken being barbecued. And she did already have a dress. And Drew was expecting to be able to give the baby his name. And the prenup was signed.

  She took a step back. “You know what? I’m fine. I’ll see you at five.”

  At three o’clock Tia’s mother hustled Tia to her room. She filled her bathtub with warm water and bubbles, then left Tia with instructions to just relax.

  An hour later she returned with Tia’s two cousins—her bridesmaids in tow. Everybody seemed to be talking at once as Tia’s little bedroom suddenly filled with huge garment bags containing full-skirted, rose-colored dresses and matching sun hats.

  Maggie and Annie slipped into their gowns, and Tia’s mother helped Tia into her tulle-skirted, satin bridal gown. When they were dressed, Elizabeth shepherded the bridesmaids out of the room before pulling a jewelry box from a drawer in Tia’s dresser.

  “What’s this?”

  Elizabeth smiled. “I hid it here this week so I could surprise you. It’s a family tradition.”

  Tia drew a long breath, then opened the box that contained her grandmother’s pearls. Her eyes round with confusion, she looked up at her mother. “You can’t give me these! They were your mother’s.”

  “And now they’re yours. And when your daughter—if this is a daughter—” she said, patting Tia’s still-flat tummy “—gets married, you can give them to her.”

  Overcome with guilt, Tia handed the box back to her mother. “No, Mom. I can’t.”

  Elizabeth took the box, but not to put it back in the drawer. Instead, she lifted out the pearls and slid the strand around Tia’s neck. “You have to.” She hooked the clasp and let the translucent pearls fall to Tia’s throat. “It’s tradition.”

  With that, she walked to the door and opened it. “Let’s go.”

  Tia fingered the pearls, but knowing she couldn’t confess to her
mother any more than she could call off the wedding, she decided the best course of action would be to take the pearls now and give them back after her divorce.

  She took a breath. “The pearls are beautiful. Thanks.”

  “You’re welcome,” Tia’s mother laughed. “For a second there I thought you were getting cold feet and you were about to say something like you couldn’t go through with the wedding. Then I was going to panic! You may be able to deal with being pregnant and not married, but I’m still old-fashioned enough to want you married. Besides, Drew’s a good man. I’ve always liked him. I couldn’t ask for a better son-in-law. I’m glad you’re marrying him.”

  She caught Tia’s hand and pulled her into the corridor where Annie and Maggie waited at the top of the steps, and Tia had no choice but to allow herself to be swept down the stairs and to the den, where her father awaited her.

  He didn’t say a word. Though her mother fussed and the bridesmaids chattered, Ben stood stonily silent in front of the French doors, waiting for his cue to walk through with his daughter. Even after the pianist played the music that ushered Annie and Maggie up the aisle between the two rows of white folding chairs, he said nothing.

  But as Tia and her father began the walk up the swath of crisp white paper that led to the little gazebo in front of her mother’s garden of wildflowers, Tia forgot about her father. From the second she raised her gaze to look at the trio of men standing at the foot of the altar—the minister, the best man and her future husband—all she could think about was Drew.

  He was drop-dead gorgeous in his tuxedo. The tailored garment showcased his height and the perfection of his build. But more than that, she suddenly realized that her mother was right. Drew was a good man. He’d come up with the plan to marry her to protect her dad. Without prompting or prodding he’d given his share of the price of her house to assure their baby had a home. Now he stood at the end of the aisle, smiling reassuringly at her, telling her with his expression that if she would trust him everything would be okay.